Austin, Aiden and Isaac,
This day is always full of mixed emotions. Five years ago was the worst day of my life and yet strangely enough the biggest blessing as well. I had hit rock bottom. It threw your lives, Jen’s life and her kids lives all into disarray. It was scary and confusing for everyone. I’m so sorry my actions put you through that. It’s been hard not being in your lives, helping you and watching you grow. I morn that loss.
But it’s been a huge blessing because hitting rock bottom really has propelled me forward into recovery and into what is important in life. I have been able to focus on being better and doing better. I hope one day to be involved in your lives enough that you’ll be able to see that. I love you and think about you boys often. I hold hope for the day to see and talk to you again.
Love always
Dad
Hi boys, I was just thinking about you today and missing you. Five years ago our lives all drastically changed. Some people would say for the worse, but in retrospect I am grateful for everything that happened, minus loosing communication with you.
Your dad and I feel that he had a second chance and has been able to take his struggles and help other people. He is always getting phone calls from guys who need his help, a listening ear and guidance on how to navigate their addiction. He supports people he met in jail, often with life advice and how to have a healthy life and relationships. Every Thursday he is a leader in two different men’s groups.
I support women who have been betrayed with their feelings and emotions. It can be hard sometimes but I love supporting and doing what I can.
With other people in community and those who know us, we freely share our story and what has happens. It’s not a fun story to share and often times it is embarrassing, but we share our story to help those around us.
I’m not sure why I’m writing all this, maybe just because I wish you really knew us. Not just everything you’ve been told. But that you could come see our actions, who we are, and find forgiveness and healing in your own hearts.
Nana sent me a picture today of Isaac when he was a little boy. I’ll attach it here. She said, “😢I miss that little cutie 🩷” we both talked about how happy the day will be when we can have you in our lives again. We all miss you. Terribly. We all love you. I believe healing will come, but it will just be a manner of time.
Love you so much!
Jen
